Shabbat Shalom Weekly

/in /by

Torah Portion: Vayetzei

 

Making Time Fly
by Rabbi Dr. Mordechai Schiffman

While every minute has 60 seconds and every hour has 60 minutes, our perception of time can change, making some minutes feel like hours and some hours feel like minutes.

In a fascinating experiment, Leah Campbell and Richard Bryant, studied how first-time skydivers perceived time in relation to their first jump (detailed in their creatively titled article, “How time flies: A study of novice skydivers”). Divers who felt afraid reported that the experience took longer than it did in reality, and divers who felt excited reported that the event took shorter than it actually did.

Time drags on when we are afraid and really does fly when we are having fun. Yet, Philip Gable and Bryan Poole present an important caveat to the adage. Just being content or satisfied doesn’t necessarily make time seem fast, but rather, fun or excitement in the pursuit of a goal is what makes time fly (as summed up in their creatively titled paper, “Time flies when you’re having approach-motivated fun”).

Yaakov, who loved Rachel very deeply, offered to work seven years for her father Lavan, so that he could marry her. How would you predict the passage of time would feel if you had to wait seven years before marrying the person you loved? Presumably, for most of us, those seven years would drag on and feel like “forever.” Interestingly, we are given a glimpse into Yaakov’s subjective time perception when the verse states, “they seemed to him but a few days (“ke-yamim achadim”) because of his love for her (Bereishit 29:20). Somehow, the seven years “flew by” for Yaakov, which flies in the face of our hypothesis that the seven years would feel excruciatingly slow.

In fact, Rabbi Moshe Alshich is so convinced that because of Yaakov’s love and longing for Rachel, “every day would feel like a thousand years,” that he contends that it is only in retrospect that he could say that the time went by quickly. During the seven years it was painful and agonizing. It is only afterwards, that the power of his love and connection to Rachel made him forget the excruciating anguish of the wait time.

Other commentaries disagree. They assume that Yaakov’s perception of the seven years was quick, even while he was still waiting. Abarbanel suggests that Yaakov’s love for Rachel was so great that he thought that seven years was a great deal for him; he would have been ready and willing to spend even more time in pursuit of her. Consequently, the time frame did not seem daunting for him and he went through it with a positive mindset.

Similarly, Samuel David Luzzatto (Shadal) suggests that his love for Rachel infused each day with peace, enjoyment, and hope. It is pain, discomfort, and negative emotions that make time seem longer, but peace and positive emotions make time fly by.

Chatam Sofer approaches it not from an emotional standpoint, but from a goal-oriented perspective. Only someone who is waiting for time to pass would feel that time is slow. However, to Yaakov’s credit, despite the fact that he loved her so much, he was able to treat each day with the proper reverence, taking advantage of his time, acting productively, and being mindful of his task each day. Rabbi Aharon Kotler takes the concept one step further. Not only did Yaakov not squander his time, he used the time to actively work towards a goal. He knew that he still needed to develop himself personally and spiritually in order to build a family and fulfill the destiny that was outlined in his dream. He used this time to continue to cultivate his strengths

Combining the approaches together, we learn from Yaakov two essential ingredients for leading a purposeful and engaged life that doesn’t feel like it is dragging on: savor the experience of positive emotions while simultaneously planning and implementing meaningful goals.

The Jewish Home
by Rabbi Zev Leff

The Jewish home creates the environment of Jewish values and morals, an inner sanctum of spirituality that serves as the foundation of Judaism.

Not like Avraham who called [the Temple] “mountain,” and not like Yitzhak who called it “field,” but rather like Yaakov who called it “house”… (Talmud – Pesachim 88a)

Maimonides in the beginning of Hilchos Beis HaBechirah lists three functions of the Holy Temple in Jerusalem, the Beis Hamikdash: (1) to be a bayis laHashem – literally, God’s house; (2) to be the place where sacrifices will be offered; and (3) to be the place to which the Jewish people will ascend three times yearly to celebrate the festivals.

The Beis Hamikdash serves as a mountain (har), a place to ascend to, to look up to, a place that inspires one to feel that he is in the shadow of the Shechina, the Divine Presence. That is the function of the Beis Hamikdash emphasized by Avraham: Har Hashem yera’eh — “the mountain upon which God will be seen” and from which the Jewish people will be observed by God. This refers to the first Beis Hamikdash, on which the Shechina devolved and which made a profound impression on those who stood in its shadow.

Yitzchak emphasized the second function of the Beis Hamikdash by calling it a “field” (sadeh), a place for growth and development, an environment conducive to bringing out all man’s various emotions and expressing them in God’s service. This was the essence of the second Beis Hamikdash, which lacked the full measure of Shechina, but which still served as a place for prayer and the bringing of the sacrifices.

It was left to Yaakov, however, to perceive the all-encompassing nature of the Beis Hamikdash as the House of God. Yaakov clearly knew the place of the future Mikdash as one where his forefathers prayed. That is why he returned after having passed by on his way to Charan. Nevertheless after awakening from his dream, he exclaimed:  “surely God is in this place and I did not know it….How awesome is this place.  This is non other than God’s House, and this is the Gateway to Heaven.”  (Genesis 28:16-17)

Although he knew of the distinction of this site as a mountain and a field, its significance as a house, which he perceived at that moment, overshadowed either of those designations. That designation applies to the third Beis Hamikdash, which will be eternal and influence the entire world.

Yaakov perceived this aspect of the Beis Hamikdash as he was ready to descend into exile, where his children would be as the dust of the earth, trod upon by all the nations of the world, yet, at the same time, a source of inspiration and blessing to the entire world. In exile the concept of “God’s House” would be embodied in the House of Prayer, House of Study, and the Jewish Home. These three would preserve the Jewish people in exile and enable them to return to Israel and receive the ultimate House of God, the third Temple.

To appreciate the precise function of the House of God, we must understand what a house is. A house is basically four walls, a door, and perhaps a window. The four walls serve three functions. First, they create an interior area, a private inner domain, separated from the public domain. The Jewish home must create an environment of Jewish values and morals, an inner sanctum of spirituality that serves as the foundation of Torah learning and observance.

Secondly, the walls form a partition that encompass and unite all the individuals who occupy this inner area. Peace in the home (shalom bayis) refers to the perfect harmony that the home engenders, where each individual feels himself part of a unit that must function together — each using their unique talents for a common goal.

And finally, the walls of the house serve as buffers against destructive foreign influences, hostile to Torah values.

Once the inner area is infused with sanctity and purpose, then the light from the inside can be projected from the windows, and the intense sanctity of this home environment can be exposed to the outside world

There are several Mitzvot that apply specifically to a house. The Mitzvah of Shabbos lights symbolizes the sanctity that the house must engender and the enlightenment of Torah values and ethics. In addition, the Shabbos lights symbolize the harmony that is produced when each member takes care not to step on others in the darkness of ignorance and selfishness.

The Mezuzah and ma’akeh (guardrail) represent the protection the house offers from the physical and spiritual dangers of the outside world. Checking for Chametz prior to Pesach teaches us that we must from time to time check to see if foreign influences have succeeded in invading the house and remove them.

Lastly, the Mitzvah of Chanukah lights placed outside the door or in the window symbolizes the influence that the Jewish home can have on the outside world.

The letters of the word bayis (house) itself hint to its function. The first letter, bais, represents bina, understanding — understanding of what to let in and what to keep outside. Yud is a letter of holiness, but it also represents the unity of all the separate integers that unite to form one unit of ten. The yud represents the holiness that pervades the home when all of the individuals unite in service of God with a common goal. And finally, the suf is a sign — a sign to the outside world of the Jewish home’s influence on the entire world.

It is significant that the Parsha that depicts Yaakov’s first exile deals primarily with our matriarchs. The woman is the essence of the house itself (Talmud – Shabbos 118b). To survive in exile and prepare for the Third Temple, we must strengthen our public houses, shuls, study houses, as well as our individual homes, to reflect the ultimate functions of that future house of God.

God is Very Close
by Nesanel Yoel Safran

Shabbat Shalom Weekly

/in /by

Torah Portion: Parshat Nitzavim

 

Jewish Education
by Rabbi Yehuda Appel

Judaism has always understood that a people’s future is only as great as the values it manages to inculcate into its youth. In line with this, the Torah does not command individuals to study Torah. Rather it commands us “to teach Torah to our children.” A fascinating Midrash says that when the Messiah comes, everyone will go out to meet him – with the exception of school children who will stay in class to study Torah!

Perhaps this explains the absence of television sets in many religious homes today. It is felt that the potential gain from watching educational programs is more than canceled out by exposure to less savory programs. Why subject a child to impurity while trying to inculcate values of holiness?! Moreover, even in instances where the programs are beneficial, often those hours could be better spent reading.

This issue of education plays a role in this week’s Torah portion, Vayelech. A central topic discussed in the Parsha is the Hakhel (literally “gathering”) observance. Once every seven years during the era of the Holy Temple, every Jewish man, woman, and child is commanded to go up to Jerusalem. There, the king reads sections of Deuteronomy focusing on the covenant between God and the Jewish nation. The purpose of this, explains the Torah, is for the people to hear “so they will learn and shall fear the Lord your God.”

Interestingly, the next verse specifically singles out babies, stating: “And the children who do not know – they shall hear and shall learn to fear the Lord your God.” What possible benefit can there be to schlepp along “children who do not know”? It is not simply because their parents have no alternative means of childcare! Rather, the Torah makes it clear that the children’s presence at the Hakhel ceremony will cause them “to learn to fear the Lord Your God.”

The Sfas Emes, a Chassidic master of the last century, gives several reasons for this command. First, he suggests that conscious cognition is not the only way that human beings learn things. Even though an infant may not consciously understand what is being said at the Hakhel ceremony, his soul can still be very much affected.

Furthermore, the Sfas Emes notes, when the child grows up he will have a greater appreciation of the importance of Torah study, knowing that his parents carried him for miles and miles just so he could hear the king read from the Torah! Experience bears this out: Many of the greatest Torah scholars came from poor homes, where the parents sacrificed basic of necessities in order that their children should receive the best Torah education.

In the final analysis, it is not what we give to our children, but the sacrifices that we make for them – particularly in the area of education – that really counts.

Choosing Life This Rosh Hashanah
by Rabbi Ron Jawary

The Shofar wakes u ap on auto-pilot.

“You should choose life” (Deut. 30:19). The Chafetz Chaim (1933) teaches that most people feel they belong to an exclusive club of people who will never die. One of the ideas of Rosh Hashanah and the shofar is to wake us up from our tendency to live on auto-pilot. We do so many things without even thinking about them, either because they’ve become habitual or because we are distracted by all the things going on around us.

In order to grow spiritually and morally, a person needs to continually pay attention to his actions and make more meaningful choices. During the Rosh Hashanah prayers, we repeatedly ask to be granted life — not just in quantity, but also in quality – in order to wake us up to try to live our lives to the maximum. Interestingly, the highlight of the prayers is a line where we all acknowledge that life, in reality, is finite. If we understand that we are only here once, we would seriously think about what kind of a legacy we want to leave behind and live our lives accordingly.

That’s one of the ideas behind hearing the shofar: to wake us up from our spiritual and moral slumber and lethargy. The Rambam teaches that the biggest mistake a person can make is to feel he is perfect and doesn’t need to improve himself. Now is the time to wake up and choose life.

A NEW HEAD

Rosh Hashanah literally means “head of the year.” Rabbi Aharon Soloveitchik (20th century) explains this to mean that Rosh Hashanah is a time to reset our minds, to look back at the past year, to see where we tended to fail, and to establish a new routine, maximizing the opportunity presented to us every day to deepen our connection to God and to life.

This idea is symbolized by the blowing of the shofar. We start off with a long straight blast, symbolizing that “God made us straight” (the Jewish concept of original virtue), followed by two types of broken sounds symbolizing our moral and spiritual failures in life.

Some of us have major failings (symbolized by shevarim, three broken sounds), some of us have minor failings (symbolized by teruah, 9 shorter sounds), and some of us have a combination of both. When we hear these sounds, we should reflect on our shortcomings and resolve to at least try not to be satisfied with our spiritual and moral status quo.

In order to reinforce the idea that we can indeed change, we blow another long blast at the end to show us that it is within our power to straighten ourselves out and overcome and rectify our mistakes and failings. Attempting to rectify our mistakes is one effective way to ensure our year will be good and sweet.

ROSH HASHANAH’S LENGTHY PRAYER

One of the things a person is meant to strive for on Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur is to become a more spiritual, moral person — to be less negative and cynical and to become a kinder and more gracious individual. The prayers on Rosh Hashanah emphasize three things a person needs to understand in order to achieve these or any meaningful goal he sets for himself.

The first is called “kingship,” which represents the idea that in order to achieve any consistent growth, a person needs to have order and consistency in his life.

The second section is “remembrance,” which reminds us of Abraham’s willingness to sacrifice his son. This section signifies that in order to achieve our goals and change our habits, we have to be willing to make sacrifices in life — to let go of our egos and not let most of the petty things that usually throw us off balance affect us.

Finally, “shofarot,” ending with a “long, straight blast” to signify that we all have the ability and power to achieve our goals, to “straighten” ourselves out, and to realize that any setback we may experience is only temporary. Our moral and spiritual destiny is in our hands.

 

Courage of Convictions
by Nesanel Yoel Safran

From this week’s Torah Portion

“Who in the world is afraid of butterflies?” Nancy laughed, as her friend, Janet, squirmed and ducked to the side of the trail to move away from the fluttering fliers. They were taking a hike around the nature trail of their local park, but Janet was more than a little unnerved by the various fauna they were encountering along the way.

“Look,” Janet said, “I admit that they’re pretty and everything, but they’re still … ooh … bugs, y’know?”

Nancy rolled her eyes. “All I know is that you’re the biggest scaredy-cat I’ve ever met. When that cute little grasshopper jumped across the trail, I thought you were going to jump out of your skin!”

Janet blushed. “What can I tell you?” she said, “I guess you’re just braver than me, that’s all.”

The kids had hiked a while longer when they heard some rowdy laughter around the bend. As they approached, they noticed a couple of tough-looking bigger kids standing by a tree. One of them was poking a stick at a hole in the trunk as a worried-looking squirrel scampered on a branch above.

“C’mon, let’s go past those guys fast,” Nancy whispered to Janet. “They found a nest of baby squirrels and if we hurry, they’ll keep on bothering them instead of us.”

Nancy took a number of quick, breathless strides and then relaxed. “Okay, we’re past them. Now, like I was saying,” she turned around to speak to Janet … but her friend wasn’t there.

Looking, back up the trail, Nancy couldn’t believe what she saw. Not only had Janet not raced past the bullies – she was talking to them! Afraid, but even more curious, Nancy doubled back to listen in … at a good, safe distance, of course.

“I don’t think you heard me well enough,” Nancy heard Janet’s voice say in a stronger tone than she’d ever heard her use before. “These are innocent creatures and you will not harm them. If you don’t put down that stick and move on right now, I’m reporting you to the park authorities.”

Nancy cringed. “Get over here, you crazy fool,” she mouthed silently, trying to get Janet’s attention. But if Janet saw her, she paid no attention, standing ramrod straight, arms crossed in front of her, staring the stick-bearer square in the eye.

Nancy was reviewing her first-aid training in her mind – poor Janet was surely going to soon need it – when her jaw dropped, as the big kids, muttering something, mildly ambled past her down the trail, leaving their stick on the ground, harmlessly behind!

“Wow! How’d you ever manage that?” Nancy said, rushing to Janet’s side.

As if noticing her friend for the first time, Janet turned to her and blushed. “It’s wrong to torment helpless animals,” she said simply. “Someone had to protect them. Now do you think, maybe we can go home? The mosquitoes are going to be coming out soon and they give me the c-reeeeeps!”

Nancy nodded silently at her scaredy-cat friend. The absolute bravest kid she ever met.

Discussion Questions

Ages 3-5

Q. How did Paul feel at first about saying the wrong directions on purpose?

A. He felt it was funny and there was nothing wrong with it.

Q. How did he feel in the end?

A. He regretted doing it and was glad it hadn’t got him into trouble.

Ages 6-9

Q. What life-lesson could someone learn from this story?

A. Intentionally misleading people is a form of harming them and it isn’t something a caring person should do.

Q. Did the tourist on the scooter ‘deserve’ being misled, because of the disrespectful way he acted?

A. While he certainly should have shown respect to the places and people he visited, the fact that he didn’t, doesn’t justify the boys causing him any form of harm. Someone else’s ‘wrong,’ doesn’t release us from our ethical obligation to do ‘right.’

Ages 10 and Up

Q. Is it all right to fool or mislead someone if it won’t cause him any practical harm?

A. While it’s better than fooling them and also causing harm, the very act of intentionally misleading others, diminishes their dignity and makes the ‘fooler’ into a less essentially honest person.

Q. Isn’t much advertising and business practice based on subtly misleading others and advising them to purchase things not necessarily for their benefit?

A. Unfortunately, yes. The Torah does not condone such practices and while one is allowed and encouraged to try to make a comfortable living, it shouldn’t be through deceit.

Quote of the Week

“Who acts from love is greater than who acts from fear” — Talmud, Sota

Joke of the Week

 

Shabbat Shalom!!

Staff:   Rabbi Yosef David, Rabbi Shmuel Greenwald, Mimi David, Shelley Dean, Caren Goldstein

Board of Directors: Jenn Cohen, Adam Herman, Brett Fox, Bob Kaiser, Malcolm Klearman, Lizzy Goldenhersh Kline, Joy Marcus, Mike Minoff, Ella Pernik, Leila Redlich, Caryn Rudman, Bruce Waxman, Tziona Zeffren